Friday 29 August 2008

pushing an elephant up the stairs.....

Stray is working on the last two chapters of  the climate change book. The one-last-heave philosophy is taking its toll. 

Its 9pm, and she has been working on it most of the day. 

Stray: I need a nap. Can you wake me in an hour?
Ms M: 40 minutes is the optimum time for a power nap. Any longer than that and you go into REM. 
Stray: And then what happens?
Ms M: ....pauses....there's a joke here somewhere if only I can find it.......
You wake up singing impenetrable lyrics, inspired by Durkheim and relevant only to sociology students.
Stray: Shit. What happens if I sleep for two hours?
Ms M:  You go into Coldplay.
Stray: And?
Ms M: You wake up either wanting to slit your wrists or sing songs about saving humanity, or sing songs about saving humanity that make the rest of us want to slit our wrists. 
Stray:  And if I sleep all night?
Ms M:  You go into U2......and wake up with  a narcissistic disorder and I have to kill you.* 
Stray: Wake me up after just the 40 minutes then.

* Q: What's the difference between Bono and God?
    A: God doesn't walk down Grafton Street thinking he's Bono. 




12 comments:

Pants said...

Oh Ms M - You are a joy.


xxx

Pants

trousers said...

This way, Madness surely lies :)

trousers said...

Oh, and what's the difference between the psychiatrist and his/her patients?

The patients only think they're God..

Ms Melancholy said...

Hey lovely Pants,

I fear I am really a cynical old trout, but our Badger has me practicing my hoping so I can probably say that I am in recovery.

How lovely to see you back in these parts. My new life permits considerably less blogging than my old one, but I shall pop by soon.

xxx

Hey Trousers, the old ones are definitely the best.

(Do you know the difference between a psychotherapist and a psychiatrist?

Approximately 60k a year. Boom boom.)

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