Friday, 14 March 2008

If celebrities couldn't lie ...

So, Mr / Ms Sports-celebrity, why are you learning to camel race for Sports Relief?

Well, I'm raising money for children with disabilities because our society has abandoned all concept of collective responsibility for the young / sick / old / disadvantaged people in our community.  We refuse to pay more taxes because we don't trust the government not to give it all to chavs / spend it on coffee machines from John Lewis.  I could personally afford to give away 90% of what I earn and still live like a king, but hey - why the hell should I?  Instead I'm generously giving a whole 2 days of my precious time up to go on an all-expenses-paid trip to a far flung place where the children are cuter and less gobby than the little shits in that council estate I won't park my Lexus in.  

8 comments:

Böbø said...

Here Here, Stray! (Though for my blood pressure, I didn't watch it). You pretty much hit the hypocritical nail on the sanctimonious head.

But Why? said...

I would laugh, but it's sadly not very funny...

trousers said...

It would be so refreshing if a celeb were to actually say that. Doubtful it'll ever happen though...

Stray said...

Yes Bobo, for Ms M's blood pressure we had to veto the heart-string tugging VTs and sincere appeals direct to camera.

We wondered whether countries with advanced socially funded systems such as Sweden have charity telethons?

But Why? ... no, and clashed horribly with the coverage of whatever has gone on over in Dewsbury ...

Trousers - oh! Please yes ... let's find one enlightened celeb and make it happen. Live on the BBC. It would be great.

Misssy M said...

Nothin's worth nothin' if there isn't a C-lister attached to it. Avoided BBC last night like the plague.

Those so-called documentaries about saving elephants and orang-utans etc communing with ex-Eastenders are the pits also. Ugh!

I want an embargo on celebrities holding cubs, african babies and kids with leukemia. It's pointless.

Böbø said...

You'd of thought that the risk of being outed by Chris Morris (sadly not seen on TV for a while) would have given celebs cause to pause before they tried to glorify themselves such puerile efforts.

Political Umpire said...

You forget: "because my career is in freefall and this is the only gig my agent could get me"

But Why? said...

Well, I guess in codemy, timing is everything.

*I can't quite bring myself to correct the typo...*

On an unrelated matter, my father has started blogging. I tell you this because a) I am exercising my right to hold you entirely responsible for the unleashing another Spurs fan upon the 'sphere, and b) because there is something very weird and bizarrely fitting about the concept that my father's blog is your blogging grandkid.